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Jessica is fat, Jennifer has nice biscuits, Scarlett loves Woody, Hilary hates sexy, Eva is shy, Katie wants to be a designer, Gwen is a designer, and Heidi’s got legs.
Off to a late start, so here’s a quick round-up.
- Jessica Simpson, after religiously following the South Beach Diet and sticking to a gruelling butt-tightening exercise workout, has admitted that she is allowing herself to have a few treats now that her movie has finished. She confesses that she has “cheat days now when I go to the movies and eat a bag of Peanut M&Ms.” Good gawd, a whole bag?! She should be locked up.
- Alias star Jennifer Garner has revealed that she and her sisters call their boobs biscuits. According to her, “Sometimes when I’m on the Alias set and the guys are setting up a camera shot, I’ll ask, ‘Is this a biscuit shot’ and they’ll say, ‘Yeah,’ so I’ll know.” That kinda gives a whole new meaning to biscuits and gravy.
- In a recent Cosmo questionnaire, goddess of the silver screen Scarlett Johansson has admitted that she thinks Woody Allen is the sexiest man in Hollywood. She also thinks “sex is appropriate on the first date, her favourite body part is her feet and she feels sexiest in ‘a man’s shirt’.” Scarlett lusts for Woody?
- Singer/actress (or actress/singer?) Hilary Duff is speaking out against looking sexy. She has called Jessica Simpson and Briney Spears immature and warned that they will regret their sexy on-stage antics. She doesn’t feel that “taking your clothes off or going out and getting wasted every night is a sign of maturity”. This all coming from someone who isn’t even 18 yet. She’s just upset that she now has bigger teeth than a walrus.
- Desperate Housewives star Eva Longoria said she barely found the courage to wear a barely-there tangerine bikini on stage at the MTV Video Music Awards. She recalls that she had a nervous episode backstage just before stepping out and that her stylist had to push her out while her girlfriends were cheering her on — “it was (the outfit) classy and beautiful and looks almost like a dress - if you just put the bottom on… I was visually vulnerable.” Pictures of her in a bikini have been plastered around the interwebnet and she’s just getting concerned now?
- Katie Holmes has expressed the desire to play fashion designer and design the wedding dress of her dreams. The star who has graced many a magazine cover is “already browsing through fashion magazines in search for the inspiration for that perfect wedding dress.” Katie, really, it’s not too late. Escape while you still can, we’ll all understand.
- Meanwhile, singer turned fashion designer Gwen Stefani has come into her own. She will showcase her range of designs at the New York Fashion Week. Her plan is to “unveil the floral designs for her spring 2006 L.A.M.B. collection on the ramp as part of her first major fashion show.” She has expressed concern over the show, but has also remarked, “I’m not being treated like a celebrity wannabe fashion designer.” Perhaps Katie should ask Gwen to design her dress.
- And finally, Heidi Klum has said that her two legs are worth £2.2 million (€3.18 million, $3.95 million). Her employer insured them after a London auction house estimated their value. Should she choose to sell them, “she’d probably get less for one of them because of a small scar from a fall.” Actually, I think they’d be worthless without the rest of her attached to them, naked, but that’s just me.